Dear America

Dear America,

It’s me, your uterus.

Or, well. Your collective uterus. Your daughter’s uterus. Your wife’s uterus. Your mother’s uterus. Your granddaughter’s uterus. YOUR UTERUS.

You know, the one that makes the future happen? the one that each and every one of you incubated in for months? Yeah, that uterus.

When you go to the polls tomorrow, please know that my future, that is, the future of your uterus, is in your hands.

Ultimately, a vote for Trump is a vote against YOURSELF. #donthurtyourself

A vote for Trump is a vote against the future of reproductive rights and basic healthcare for women. It is a vote that actually perpetuates the war on women. That validates sexual predators, minimizes sexual assault, that says, “fuck you, ladies, we can’t trust you with your own bodies, so white men will take charge, thanks!” it’s a vote that takes America back in time. Seriously, here’s a cheat sheet to all the shit he’s done, that by voting for him, or indeed by not voting at all, you condone him.

Actually, fucking ironically, it is a vote that takes the whole world back in time. In a moment when places like Ireland and Poland are wavering on allowing women access to abortion, we cannot elect someone here, whose policies and vp pick will make those reproductive rights even more difficult to secure here in the “land of the free.” Fucking horrif. The world won’t look to us for ideas on progress and innovation any longer, instead we will become beacon of scarlet for all the world in what NOT to do. Imma need y’all to vote Hillary by tomorrow.

I actually hope that if Hillary isn’t elected tomorrow,  it signifies the end. The end of America’s “reign.” With Trump at the helm, there’s only one way to go and that’s rock bottom. Underground. The US will beat britain out for the biggest political blunder of the century, which is VERY fucking impressive considering this is the year of brexit. The year of SCARLET. Please don’t wait at the sidelines and depend on other voters to take a hit for the team. DO YOUR PART. VOTE.

Salman Rushdie said it best:

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Sure, she ain’t perfect, she’s done some shady shit (however there is room to say she would not be plagued with such scrutiny as has been seen in this election if she was a man- sexism is real people. like, Baby Bush lost a bunch of emails too, but apparently that’s okay, because. crazy republicans. Double standard much!?)

At least she will protect us, your future baby makers. she’s one of us. Part of the uteri gang.

Ladies, it’s time to get in formation.

We’re with her.

Join us.


Your uterus.

P.S. IF, by some fuckery, he gets elected, we’re on the first boat back to Ireland on Wednesday. There’s a bunker ready to go for us underneath grogan’s bar. Send a spice bag to keep us going.

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